Mentor Hours at She Mentors aren’t about telling someone what to do. They’re about creating space — space to think, reflect, challenge assumptions, and make sense of complex decisions with someone who’s been there.

This is intentional. Leadership and learning research consistently shows that people build more clarity, confidence and momentum when they arrive at their own conclusions, rather than being handed answers. Reflection and good questions create stronger ownership — and far more follow-through — than advice ever does.

That’s why our approach looks a lot like executive peer supervision and action learning, long-standing leadership practices across the UK and Australia. The focus isn’t on fixing or advising, but on deep listening, thoughtful questions, and surfacing blind spots in real, lived contexts.

The goal isn’t to solve the problem for someone — it’s to help them see the problem more clearly. And when people own their thinking, they’re far more likely to act, even when the path isn’t neat or obvious.

Boundaries that keep it ethical

Confidentiality
Agree upfront what stays in the room (and any exceptions, such as serious risk). Reflective supervision frameworks consistently highlight confidentiality as essential for trust and openness. She Mentors explicitly notes that some issues are private or confidential — naming this early helps create safety.

Conflicts of interest
If you can’t be neutral — or you’re simply not the right person — it’s okay to decline and encourage a rebook. This is standard practice in executive peer supervision and is reinforced in the She Mentors Code of Conduct.

Stay in scope
Mentor Hours are not therapy, legal advice or crisis support. If a conversation moves into medical, mental health or legal territory, the most responsible action is to pause and encourage appropriate professional support.

Why pyschological safety matters

Psychological safety plays a big role here too. Research led by Professor Amy Edmondson (Harvard / MIT Sloan) shows that people are more likely to speak honestly, reflect deeply and take learning risks when they feel safe from judgement or embarrassment. In leadership settings, psychological safety is strongly linked to learning, adaptability and performance.

Mentor Hours should feel “safe enough” for uncertainty, doubt and half-formed ideas. That means being non-judgemental, avoiding “you shoulds”, and remembering that many women are carrying invisible loads — from workplace politics and caregiving to reputation risk. Often, a calm, respectful presence matters more than any insight you could offer.

Sharing experience without sliding into advice

When mentors do share experience, we encourage generosity without prescription. What worked for you may not work for someone else — context always matters. Research into senior women’s leadership circles consistently shows that story-sharing and pattern recognition are more empowering than advice-giving, particularly in complex or ambiguous situations.

A few simple ways to keep this clean and ethical:

Ask first: “Want to hear a couple of approaches I’ve seen work?”

Offer options, not directives: “Three patterns I’ve seen are… which fits your context?”

Surface trade-offs: “The upside is X; the risk is Y.”

Return agency: “Given what you know about your workplace or life, what feels right?”

Because at She Mentors, reflection beats advice every time.

Quick “mentor moves” that work well

Mirror power and context: “What constraints are real here — and which might be assumed?”

Name the invisible load: stakeholders, identity, reputation risk, caregiving, organisational politics.

Make it values-led: “What would future-you thank you for?”

End with ownership: “What are you choosing?”

The She Mentors principles

✅ Stay pitch-free and community-first
No selling, no promoting, no follow-up unless the member invites it. This is about generosity, not gain.

✅ Think partner, not expert
You don’t need to have the answers. Your role is to help someone think more clearly, not tell them what to do.

✅ Ask thoughtful questions
Curious, open questions help uncover what really matters and what’s getting in the way.

✅ Create psychological safety
Be warm, non-judgemental and human. Normalise uncertainty — careers and leadership are rarely neat.

✅ Share experience, not prescriptions
If you share what’s worked for you, offer it as an option, not advice. Context always matters.

✅ End with clarity
Support the member to name one small, realistic next step they’ll take after the session.